Yesterday I woke up on the wrong side of the crib… I mean bed. It was just one of those days where nothing seems to go right. Here’s how it started:
Wake up to a beautiful day. For some reason this annoys me (not sure if it is the waking up or the beautiful day that did it.) Walk to coffee shop for the perfect combo of sugar and caffeine that will put things right. After waiting in line for 10 min, discover that the coffee shop doesn’t have lids for my to go coffees – which wouldn’t be a big deal if I didn’t have to walk a half mile with a coffee in each hand. Oh yeah, and if I was even half as graceful as a drunk three-year-old. Begin to feel face flush with annoyance, but wave it off. Go to another coffee shop that has lids but not the sugary latte I wanted. Pout a bit. Discover Facebook has stopped working on my phone. Pout more. Erase Facebook and attempt to redownload. Discover that before I can download Facebook again, I need to update my phone’s software. Take deep breath. Learn that before I can update my phone, I need to update my iTunes. Engage yoga/labor breathing. Find out that before I can update my iTunes I need to deauthorize my other computers and reauthorize my laptop. Aggressively chug cup of coffee. Burn throat but pretend not to notice. Discover that I can’t reauthorize my laptop because my disc is out of space.
Take deep breath. Doesn’t work. Inhale cinnamon toast. Choke on cinnamon. Repeat. Twice. Attempt to make space on laptop by removing pictures and movies onto a hard drive. Spend one hour doing this. Finally realize that in doing this, my pictures are now a mess on the hard drive without any kind of order, labeling or anything that would enable me to find any picture ever. Pick up laptop. Smash it on desk like a guitarist on stage at a rock show. Just kidding. But think hard about picking up laptop and smashing it on my desk like a guitarist on stage at a rock show. Instead text husband an angry tantrum text about how I wish technology would die and huff around the house, cleaning up by throwing things (gently) into their places. Man, I really showed those teddy bears!
The rest of the day continued on like this, with everything going a little wrong and with me totally overreacting and throwing a temper tantrum like a toddler.
When it was time to go pick up my actual toddler, I was delighted to discover that she was also in a foul mood. She didn’t want to come inside, but she didn’t want stay outside either. She didn’t want to sit in her high chair, but when I set her back down she was pissed too. She didn’t know what she wanted and nothing could make her happy. She was impossible. And I know exactly how she felt. Even though dealing with a cranky baby was the last thing I wanted to do when I was busy being a cranky baby myself, it made me smile how alike we are sometimes.
Here’s the thing though. She is a baby. I am not. Usually. She’s one and a half. I am thirty… well, ya know, old enough to know better. I am not a slave to my emotions. I have the power to turn my mood around. I just chose not too. I chose to let myself sulk and wallow in my bad mood and spend the day in a long-term temper tantrum. But then my husband came home with cupcakes and slightly frightened eyes and a patient smile. He spoke gently and coddled me, just like he does with our daughter when she is being outrageous. And you know what… it felt pretty good. I have to be an adult most of the time, but I guess every now and then I just need to be a baby. So, realizing this, I took my bottle (of wine) like a good little girl and went to bed.
And today I am an adult again. Damn.